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Lots of people are buzzing about the recent New York Times Magazine cover story, “What is it About 20-Somethings?” The article focuses on the fact that today’s 20-somethings are “delaying adulthood” by moving back in with their parents, marrying later and hopping from career to career.

The article speculates about whether these shifts are happening because of the current economy, a fundamental change in the definition of adulthood or -- as many of the article’s more negative commenters believe -- the “entitled” nature of the Millennial generation.

Personally, I believe that 20-somethings are simply reflecting the reality of our current times. But I have seen evidence that many Millennials aren’t aware of the way they are perceived, particularly in the workplace. I frequently hear recruiters and employers complain that today’s young people have a sense of entitlement -- a belief that they deserve jobs, high salaries and advanced responsibilities even when they don’t have much experience.

Whether you personally feel this way or not, it’s important to understand that this perception of 20-somethings is out there. In many companies, the older generations are still in charge, so when you're looking for a job or wanting to advance in your career, you’ll have a better chance of success if you avoid the “entitled” label. Here are some tips for overcoming the “e” word:

1. Show appreciation for responsibility and opportunity.

One of the biggest grievances I hear from managers is that Gen Y employees expect to be given high-level, exciting work on day one of a job. Never forget that you are being paid to work! And your bosses probably “paid their dues” for a long time to get where they are. Many of them expect you to pay your dues too, even though technology and business move much faster these days.

The best way to receive the kind of work you want is to do a great job with every assignment you’re given. Then, when you do receive increased responsibility or a cool project, be sure to say thank you to the person who assigned it. Gratitude is remembered and rewarded.

2. Follow protocol.

While you may want to share your suggestions directly with the CEO of your company, it’s probably more appropriate for you to share those thoughts with your direct boss first. This type of hierarchical reporting structure may change someday when Gen Ys are in the corner office, but for now, it’s reality. If you’re not sure whether it’s okay to reach out to someone at a higher level, ask your boss or colleagues first.

3. Focus on what you can do for your employer, not the other way around.

In cover letters, email messages, conversations with recruiters, salary negotiations, etc., make sure you frame your value in terms of what you can offer, not what you need. Recruiters roll their eyes at cover letters that begin with, “I would like to find a position in which I can learn.” Likewise, negotiations fail when you ask for more money because, “I need it.” You’ll have a better chance of getting what you want when you focus your argument on how it will benefit the company in terms of increased sales, more productivity or lower costs. Always ask yourself, “What’s in it for them?”

As I read through the above list, it strikes me that avoiding the entitlement label is really about using your common sense and best manners. What do you think? Please share in the comments!

Earlier this week I had the privilege of speaking at the Mediabistro Career Circus in New York City. As I was preparing for my presentation on social media for job seekers, I kept thinking about something my grandfather used to say:

Lindsey, there’s a reason you have two ears and one mouth. Listen twice as much as you talk.

Needless to say, my grandpa was a man of few words (and I am definitely not!), so his advice had a real impact on me. And in the age of social media -- a time when everyone has a personal mouthpiece -- I believe that listening has become more important than ever. 

Here are some examples, from social media and beyond, of how to benefit from talking less and listening more:

Twitter. For me, Twitter is all about listening. It provides you with the opportunity to be a fly on the wall and “eavesdrop” on recruiters from companies where you’d like to work, brands you admire, breaking news in your industry and anyone else whose thoughts, ideas and movements you want to know about. When it comes to actually tweeting, I try to stick to my grandfather’s ratio. About 2/3 of my tweets are sharing other people’s information -- retweets, congratulations notes, articles I think other people would enjoy -- and 1/3 are promoting my own blog, opinions or news.

LinkedIn. Before reaching out to request a connection with people on LinkedIn, “listen” to them first by carefully reviewing their profiles, recommendations, discussion comments and status updates. Then, when you write your connection request you can mention something you have in common or something you know is important to that person. When people see that you’ve taken the time to learn something about them, they are likely to respond more positively to your networking outreach.

Job interviews. One of the reasons that recruiters say it’s so important to prepare questions to ask your interviewer is because they want to observe your listening skills. In fact, I’ve heard that the more the interviewer talks during a job interview, the more likely the interviewee is to get the job! Why? The more you listen to what a prospective employer wants, the more you can cater your answers to fit those needs.

Salary negotiation. I used to be a terrible negotiator, so I’ve taken lots of courses and read a lot on this topic. It turns out the biggest mistake I was making in my negotiations was talking too much. In any negotiation, salary or otherwise, the advantage goes to the person who is able to gather the most information -- a.k.a. the better listener. The more you ask probing, open-ended questions and listen to the other person’s answers, the more likely you are to come to a mutually beneficial solution. Bite your tongue if necessary!

Do you agree with my grandfather’s advice to listen twice as much as you talk? What tips do you have about listening? Please share in the Comments!

For many people, the July 4^th weekend marks the beginning of Slacker Season at work: the time to enjoy long lunches outside and cut out early on Fridays. I love the mellowness of summer and encourage you to enjoy the season to its fullest. I also know that you need to keep your job search or career development on track, even when it's 100 degrees in the shade. Here are some suggestions:

Revisit Your New Year’s Resolutions.

Remember that sense of optimism and new beginnings you felt as you turned your calendar to January? Pretend you’re a company with a July 1^st start to your fiscal year and reboot your resolutions right now. If you never set any goals for this year, lie on a beach towel staring at the sky and daydream about what you want to accomplish by the end of 2010. Then, commit to taking some small steps this summer (such as registering for an online course to improve your negotiation skills, going outlet shopping to perk up your professional wardrobe, revising your job description with your boss to prepare for a promotion) to move yourself forward.

Redefine “Beach Reading.”

Instead of reading the latest romance novel, gossip magazine or legal thriller by the pool, pack your tote bag with a book that will advance your career knowledge. Check out the biography of a successful business owner, a productivity guide or a job hunting manual. If you’d rather keep your eyes shut and avoid weird sunglasses tan lines, load some books onto your iPod and listen instead. Consider these 10 great career books for young professionals.

Warm Up Your Relationships.

People often have less on their plates in the summer months and are therefore more willing to take time for a networking. (And, frankly, people are just in a better mood when it’s nice outside!) If you’ve recently started a job after graduating, summer is an especially good time to build relationships with your new manager and colleagues. Be the initiator and invite people to grab an iced coffee or a mid-afternoon frozen yogurt.

The same advice goes for job seekers: set up lots of meetings and informational interviews this summer. You may find that contacts who were too busy a few months ago now have some availability for an informational interview or casual chat.

Tweet from the Beach.

Social media doesn’t go on summer hiatus. If you haven’t already, set up a Twitter profile and start following people you admire -- leaders in your industry, career experts, news sites and recruiters from the companies you want to work for (Check out  these additional suggestions for people to follow). Think of Twitter as your personal, 24/7 newsfeed of information, ideas, opinions, event listings, job announcements and other fuel for your career advancement. The Twitter universe doesn’t care if you are tweeting from a cubicle or a cabana; all that matters is that you are part of the conversation.

Summer tends to fly by too fast, so don’t wait another minute to take full advantage of all the fun—and professional opportunities—of the hottest time of year. Please share your additional suggestions in the Comments!

A few days ago I received an email from a colleague who serves with me on a nonprofit board.

“Does anyone know where I can get Mets/Yankees tickets?”

I knew (Stubhub.com!), so I responded right away.

Later that day I was desperately trying to remember the name of a website I’d recently heard about where you can find out which social media sites have your username available. After racking my brain, I decided to tweet the question. Within three minutes, I had the answer (www.namechk.com).

On another occasion recently, I was trying to make a decision about hiring a branding expert. After researching all over the web and feeling more confused and frustrated than ever, I decided to reach out to three business owners I trusted and ask for their opinions and referrals. Their advice was invaluable and I was finally able to make my decision.

All of these situations reminded me of the most important career growth tip you can learn:

Ask for help when you need it.

There are vast resources available that can help you with any issue you face. The only catch is that you have to reach out for help -- no person or search engine or social network will know you need help until you request it.

If you’re having trouble figuring out your career passion, reach out to your university’s career center for an alumni appointment by phone or in person. (Hint: They are often free!)

If you’re unsure whether your resume or LinkedIn profile accurately represents your skills, ask a few trusted friends or colleagues to review them.

If you’re scared to attend a networking event alone, ask a friend to join you.

If you can’t figure out how to ask for a raise, go out and buy a negotiation book or hire a career coach to role play the salary negotiation until you’re comfortable.

If you can’t decide what printer to buy, ask your Facebook friends for recommendations.

Websites, books, blogs, Twitter feeds, LinkedIn Answers, career centers, coaches, friends and family members all have a wealth of knowledge and advice to share with you. Next time you face any career question, large or small, ask for help sooner rather than later. You'll be amazed at how much more quickly your career progresses.

Last week I hosted an etiquette dinner at a college in New York City.  Students came in their best business casual attire, networked during a “mocktail” hour and then sat down to a formal business dinner. Believe it or not, we had a lot of fun talking about which fork to use when and how to properly butter your bread.

It’s likely that you’ll be asked to have a meal during the job interview process, so be sure to brush up on your etiquette skills as these students did. Below are my top 10 etiquette rules for job interview-related meals. Some of these are common sense and some are a little more complicated, so review them carefully. When in doubt, take a peek around the table and watch what your hosts are doing for clues.

1.     Always use basic good manners. Say please and thank you, don’t reach (ask for items to be passed to you), keep your elbows off the table and don’t speak with your mouth full. A good tip is to take small bites so you’ll never have a big chunk of food in your mouth when an interviewer or client asks you a question!

2.     Do not start to eat until every at the table has been served.

3.     Use silverware from the outside in. The spoon and fork at the top of your plate are for coffee and dessert.

4.     Be sure to sip from the correct glass and eat the right roll. Your place setting is arranged with your bread plate to the left of your plate and your beverage to the right. I like to remember this by thinking “BMW,” like the car: Bread, Meal, Water.

5.     Bread should be buttered by breaking off one piece at a time and buttering that piece. Do not cut your bread into lots of pieces or butter the whole slice or roll at once. 

6.     It’s best to avoid drinking alcohol during the job interview process. Water, iced tea and soda are all appropriate. If you’re over 21 and you find yourself in a situation where a drink seems acceptable, be very careful about how much you consume. One glass of wine is a safe bet.

7.     Be polite and kind to servers. (Many interviewers watch your interactions with waiters and waitresses as an indication of your personality and manners.) Say please and thank you, and if you need to get a server’s attention, make eye contact and politely say, “excuse me.” Never wave your arm or shout out.

8.     When you’re finished with your meal, place your utensils together, diagonally across your plate. Place your napkin to the left of your plate, not directly on your plate. If you need to get up at any point during the dinner, the correct place to put your napkin is on the seat of your chair.

9.     Turn off and store all cell phones, iPhones, BlackBerries, etc. in your jacket or bag. It is never okay to text, email or answer a call during a business meal, especially if you are on a job interview (and even if your host is checking his or her own device!).

10. If anything goes wrong -- you drop your fork on the floor, you spill your water, etc., remember that good etiquette is about being discreet and making other people comfortable. In other words, don’t make a scene! If you drop a utensil on the floor, politely get a server’s attention and ask for a new utensil. If you have a pit or bone in your mouth, discreetly remove it with your fork or napkin (no toothpicks at the table!). If you spill a beverage, apologize to the table and get a server’s attention for help. The more comfortably you handle any snafu, the more quickly your tablemates will forget it ever happened.

Do you have any other favorite etiquette tips? Please share!

Last Friday I spoke at an event for graduate students considering careers outside of academia. I loved the energy in the room -- there was a palpable feeling of excitement and potential. Of course, there was also a fair amount of fear.

The overarching advice I shared for anyone switching directions or making a career change is to position yourself as an insider in the industry you want to join. While it’s always scary to try something new, the more homework you do and the more action you take in the direction of your goal, the likelier you are to succeed.

Even if you are not currently a career changer, you will likely make multiple career transitions in your lifetime, so this is a valuable skill to learn and practice.

Let’s look at the actions you can take to successfully change career direction:

1. Start to build new experiences. As soon as you have the idea of switching career paths, dive right in and start to build your experience in that area, even if you start with only an hour a week. You’ll need something on your resume -- volunteer work, an internship, blog posts, class work, etc. -- that shows you are really serious about breaking into a new profession. Otherwise, people will suspect that you’re all talk.

2. Read everything you can about the industry you want to enter. Start to read trade publications, blogs, e-newsletters, LinkedIn group discussions and the Twitter feeds of anyone and everyone you can follow in the industry you want to join. Know which companies are in the news, which executives are succeeding or flailing, what the hot products or services are, where people go for lunch, when and where upcoming conference are taking place. As you become more comfortable with the news and issues, start to comment on blog posts and Tweets so you can become part of the conversation and get noticed by people who are hiring.

3. Set up Google Alerts. Once you zero in on specific organizations you’d like to work for, set up Google alerts for the names of any companies you want to join. This will give you a deeper sense of the major news and issues facing those particular organizations. Alerts will also ensure that you have specific, intelligent questions to ask and conversation topics to bring up when you attend networking events or land a job interview at one of those companies.

4. Talk to anyone you can who works or has worked in the industry you want to join. While Internet research is essential, nothing beats talking to a real person who has firsthand experience in the profession that interests you. Research people in your dream industry on LinkedIn and reach out for informational interviews. Talk to your friends, family and career services office to see if they can introduce you to anyone they know in your desired field. Ask these industry mentors to recommend insider tips, must-read publications and advice on what jobs in their field are most realistic for outsiders to transition into.

There is a Facebook group called “I Judge You When You Use Poor Grammar.” It currently has over 460,000 members.

I am one of them.

Perhaps because I'm the daughter of an English teacher, I believe in the importance of proper spelling and grammar. Employers of recent college grads agree with me. In a 2007 survey, outplacement firm Challenger, Gray & Christmas asked executives, “What skill do entry-level job seekers lack the most?” The number one answer by far was written communication.

This means that good writing skills can really help you stand out from the crowd. Good grammar is a competitive advantage.  If your writing skills need some improvement, here are 7 quick tips to help you:

1. Lead with your main point. In professional writing, you are communicating in order to accomplish something, so get to the point. For instance, when you’re writing an email, state the purpose of your email in the first paragraph. When you’re writing a cover letter, state the exact job you’re applying for in the first sentence or two. Don’t make people wade through loads of details before they understand why you’re writing in the first place.

2. Be concise. Speaking of getting to the point, do it quickly and then wrap up. We live in a world of multi-taskers, so conciseness is the only way to keep people's attention (140 characters is quickly becoming our average attention span). When I review resumes, cover letters and networking emails, my first piece of advice to the writer is almost always, “make it shorter.” When you write concise, powerful sentences and paragraphs, people are more likely to pay attention. Long, rambling communications get deleted.

3. Don’t trust spell check. Because you’re a generation that’s grown up with spell check, you tend to rely on it way too much. Spell check doesn’t catch errors like confusing “effect” and “affect” or “there,” “their” and “they’re.” And it never catches misspellings of the names of people, products or companies. When in doubt, have a human being check your work, not a computer.

4. Use proper capitalization and punctuation. my biggest pet peeve when it comes to emails i receive from college students is when everything is in lower case and there is very little punctuation if any at all trust me its not cute its really unprofessional so please dont do it thnx. AND NOTE THAT ALL CAPS MAKES IT LOOK LIKE YOU ARE YELLING.

5. Limit those exclamation points! This is another big pet peeve among the older professionals I meet!! Young people use way too many exclamation points!!!

6. Consult a writing manual. What do you do when you are unsure of a grammar or punctuation usage? If you’re like most people, you shrug your shoulders and say, “Well, hope I got that right!” This is not a wise strategy. Instead, consult a writing website or manual such as The Chicago Manual of Style or the Associated Press Style Guide. Taking a few extra seconds to look up a rule can land you a job or a promotion -- it’s more than worth it.

7. Don’t hide behind your keyboard. Finally, don’t write when you should pick up the phone or talk to someone in person. Remember that the written word -- especially in the form of an email -- doesn’t always correctly convey the tone you intend. And, in situations like giving bad news, quitting a job or criticizing someone’s work, writing is simply a cop-out. Although it’s hard to have difficult conversations in person, you’ll thank yourself for doing the right thing.

What are your best writing tips? Please share!

What are the major hiring trends on campus this year? What are the best strategies for finding an entry-level job? What are the biggest mistakes students make in the job search process?

To answer these questions and more, I spoke with with Trudy Steinfeld, Executive Director of the Wasserman Center for Career Development at New York University, and Manny Contomanolis, Associate Vice President and Director of Co-op and Career Services at the Rochester Institute of Technology.

Don't miss the opportunity to hear top tips from two of the best career services professionals in the country!

Listen to the podcast interview now.